THE 6 WEIRDEST, SCARIEST PROCESSED FOODS

Here’s a link to an interesting article detailing the “6 Weirdest, Scariest Processed Foods.”  It’s a pretty entertaining read to see just how disgusting the food industry has become (and also to see how many of them you may be guilty of eating).

Anyway, I thought it would be funny to show some pics of these “foods” and follow it up with some quotes right out of the article.  I may add a few comments of my own if I feel like it.

1.    Spray Can “Easy Cheese”

“Dipping a butter knife into a tub of cheese spread and putting it on a cracker takes a lot of time and effort. Thankfully for all of us, the wizards at Kraft have developed a product that ensures we’ll never again run the risk of hurting our wrists trying to spread processed cheese. Kraft’s Easy Cheese cans combine the soulless tastelessness of its cheese products with the convenience and simplicity of whipped cream cans.”

I’ll admit, I’m guilty of eating “Easy Cheese” back in the day, but I never took the dispenser straight in my mouth and ate just the “Easy Cheese”.  That’s disgusting.

2.    Oreo Cookie Death Filling

“You see, typical frosting is made mostly from butter, milk, sugar and vanilla extract. No one will ever accuse it of being good for you, but at least you're eating fairly natural fats. Oreo stuffing, on the other hand, is basically sugar-flavored Crisco. Seriously, that’s what you’re consuming when you eat an Oreo.”

Oreos and milk are a pretty tasty combo for sure, but now that I am older and wiser and I can read the list of ingredients, I will never touch them again!

3.    Condensed Soups

“Well, consider that a mere half-cup of Campbell’s Vegetable Soup contains a heart-stopping 890 mg of sodium, or roughly 37 percent of your daily recommended sodium intake. But wait, there’s more! The typical Campbell’s soup can contains one-and-a-half cups of soup, meaning that one can of soup contains more than 90 percent of your daily recommended sodium intake.”

Instead of buying canned soups, I just recommend you pick one of the 1,000’s of recipes available to use with your Crock-Pot that combine only quality, healthy ingredients that take barely any time at all (obviously it has to cook all day in the Crock-Pot, but it doesn’t require any attention or work from you to do that).

4.    Spam

“Spam was really a major miracle of food science, as it solved a mystery that humanity had been trying for centuries to figure out: namely, how to make meat-flavored Jell-O.”

I don’t even know what to say other than “GROSS!”

5.    Artificially Flavored Blueberry Bits

“An apt description would be ‘purple globs of sugary goo,’ but they’re actually called ‘artificially flavored blueberry bits.’ Their ingredients include sugar, dextrose, soybean oil, soy protein, salt, citric acid, cellulose gum, artificial flavor, malic acid, Red 40 Lake, Blue 2 Lake and…that’s it. Notice anything missing? Oh yeah: blueberries!”

6.    Kraft’s Avocado-Free Guacamole

“This right here may be the pinnacle of processed food magic. Kraft has managed to make a food product without an actual main ingredient, akin to tomato-free tomato sauce or potato-free baked potato. Yes, there are no avocados in Kraft’s guacamole. Then what is it made of, you ask?  How about some modified food starch, coconut and soybean oils, corn syrup, food coloring…in other words, you’re eating green-colored oil.”

The story behind this one is actually pretty funny.  Some customer sued Kraft because she felt misled into buying guacamole that was not made with avocadoes.  As a result, Kraft changed the product name to “Guacamole Flavored Dip,” and as you can see they made the change before I could snag a picture of it from their website.  I think it’s also funny that Kraft eliminated the primary ingredient from a traditional dish and the healthiest one at that!